Friday, May 30, 2008

UPDATE: New blog location

Ok, so I've finally moved my blog out of “facebook only” to blogger.com so more of y'all can read it. Why someone would read my ramblings I have no idea; something to discuss with your therapist in your next session.

So, the address is http://jewishredneck.blogspot.com/ and I plan on keeping it posted within facebook via a mirror application. I also moved most of the old postings to this new blog, but the dates are obviously wrong since it lists the upload date and the comments couldn’t be transferred either. Please keep them coming though.

That’s it for now!

Shalom in your shtetl!

Update on my status... and what happened

First, thank you to everyone for the offers of help. So here’s the story:
Second softball game this morning a hard hit liner took a bad hop and I caught it with my face. :) The field was in pretty bad shape and the ball simply took a bad hop. I was knocked out for a few seconds and lost a ton of blood. Seriously, there was a ton! All-in-all it could have been much worse.

One of the bonuses of playing in a Jewish softball league? You know there’ll be a doctor available! :) Several came over from other fields/ games and got my blood pressure stabilized before moving me. Honestly, I think a few of the guys on the field were palerthan I was because of all the blood. I noticed my nose was a bit out of whack while holding the towels to it and so I reset the broken nose right there. I was surprised that it didn’t hurt more. Either that, or I was still so whacked out I couldn’t feel it.

They took me to the ER and I had a CT scan done. Nothing too bad. I had a slight concussion, my nose is broken and I look like I got beat like a government mule, but again, could have been much worse. I have a few cuts from the sunglasses I was wearing, but they probably saved my eye socket by deflecting/ dispersing just enough of the force.

I’ll not be driving for at least 24 hours and icing my cheek bone and nose a lot. I’ll see a specialist later this week to make sure the bone is healing properly and hopefully won’t have to have surgery. I’ll be sure to post some pics this week as I’m gonna have one heck of a black eye!

Thanks for all the concern. If I talked to you earlier today I may not remember because of the concussion, but I know I talked with several of you and I’ll be sure to let you know if I need anything.

Lessons for the day:
1) Don’t try to catch a smoked two hopper with your nasal passages.
2) Blackberries are fun to play with while you’re a little loopy in the ER waiting for the CT scan.
3) Swallowing a ton of blood makes you sick to your stomach. Who knew?
4) Finally, as my grandma always said, you gotta laugh.

This week's sign the apocalypse is almost upon us

This might also fall into a, “you can’t make this stuff up” category, but for now I’ll assume it’s simply part of society turning on itself and quickening the end of times. This ride will be so much fun!

So a 13 year old kid, from of all places Texas, stole his Dad’s credit card and ordered two hookers. Seriously? I didn’t even know what a hooker was at 13, much less that the hell I’d do with her!

The best part? When the hookers got suspicious, the boy and his friend told them they were people of “restricted growth” working with a traveling circus. Texas State law folks… you cannot discriminate against those with disabilities, so the prostitutes felt they had no right to refuse them, and stayed and played XBox with the kids.

I’m rethinking this whole, ‘having kids’ thing. Well folks, “be fruitful and multiply” at your own peril.

http://www.money.co.uk/article/1000390-13-year-old-steals-dads-credit-card-to-buy-hookers.htm

This week's sign the apocalypse is almost upon us

What does the new wave Finnish rock band called The Leningrad Cowboys (A.K.A.the Sleepy Sleepers), the Red Army Choir from Russia and “Sweet Home Alabama” all have in common?

All made an appearance in Russia before thousands of concert goers at the same time, on the same stage. Seriously, can’t make this up. Check out the link for the rockin’ concert and be sure to make note of the band’s hair.

Finally, someone besides an American looking stupid for the whole world to see. Maybe, just maybe, this will be the week they hate the Russians more than us. I doubt it, but I can dream, can’t I? Now, who has their Halloween costume picked out after watching this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lNFRLrP014

Canada y'all?

OMG! It is everything I can do in a very important customer meeting to NOT laugh. The customer I’m meeting with is leading the meeting right now and he has a very usual Texas drawl like most of us. Subtle, almost unnoticeable to most of us, but would stand out to Northerners.

Then, like a thunder bolt through the room, a crash in the middle of calm, BAM! a Canadian accent sneaks out in a word or two. Surely I heard this wrong. Nope, there it is again. OMG… “schedule” comes out with the Canadian “ou” and sounds like “ske-duel” with that “ou” thing in the second half. I’m dying here folks… a Canadian redneck; who knew? Now if only I can figure out how to get him to say, “This schedule tool is like a boot stuck in the Canadian mud.” :)

From the section, "You can't make this stuff up"

Life really does imitate art, but seriously, could someone have actually thought this one up as a story line? I don’t think so, only reality (and not the “reality” crap Fox pumps into our homes) could deal us a plot of having a U.S. wide matzah shortage. Seriously, people are going crazying because they can’t find their matzah.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/22/us/22matzo.html
http://www.news.com/i/bto/20080421/Photo_042008_001_270x202.jpg

Then you simply have the greedy ones who waste matzah for other’s enjoyment. (Seriously, watch this.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMSEFCQCKPo

Well, Happy Passover and guard your matzah closely. I may offer my remaining matzah on craigslist, or maybe ebay it for charity! :)

This week's sign the apocalypse is almost upon us

The New Kids on the Block are planning tour dates. Please G-d, bring the end of days sooner rather than later.
http://www.nkotb.com/

Finally... Jewish refugees acknowledged!

http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/pages/ShArt.jhtml?itemNo=970998&contrassID=1&subContrassID=1

Fitna the movie

There is nothing I can say that would add to this film. Watch it for yourself; agree, disagree, but don’t be indifferent. http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=7d9_1206624103

“First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out -
because I was not a Socialist.
Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out -
because I was not a Trade Unionist.
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out -
because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for me -
and there was no one left to speak for me.”

A poem attributed to Pastor Martin Niemöller (1892–1984) as translated at the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum

Willie Nelson at the Dallas Symphony Orchestra

Yep, that really did happen and I really was there! In fact, I splurged for sixth row seats for the first time at the Meyerson Symphony Center. The first half of the concert was Willie and the DSO performing together and after intermission it was Willie and his band.

Before I get into any details, let me say one thing. For over 50 years Willie has been performing and has cemented himself in legend and lore. He owes fans and the music world absolutely nothing at this point. Given all that, he still goes out and pushed himself into unknown territory. Kudos to him and to the DSO for trying something musically challenging and outside of the normal comfort zone.

The concert started with the DSO performing a few pieces and then Willie came out to join them. He was dressed in a black suit, complete with slacks and highlighted with black cowboy boots and a black cowboy hat. He even had his signature hair tucked into the back of his shirt.
As the combination of the DSO and Willie began it was immediately evident that Willie was out of his comfort zone and looking for queues from the conductor. That said, once he got his entrance queues the combination of symphonic melody and classic Willie crooning was something to truly behold. Words can’t do the unique combination justice.

After intermission it was like the Meyerson was transformed into a small smoky bar with Willie and his band having a jam session. No glitz, no neon, just good music and great entertainment in an intimate setting. As the mix of classics and new songs came out Willie relaxed more and more until it seemed he was finally in his element; joking with the audience and pulling us into singing along, his charm shined brightly.

After two encores the show was over, but Willie wasn’t done. He stayed around for at least 30 minutes signing autographs, posing for pictures and hamming it up for the fans who stuck around. I got my autograph (thanks to Jenn) and headed home. All-in-all, worth every penny!